12/31/12

clinxx

I've been running on the same path for years. I really want to escape but I can't. I ask for hints, but nobody give. Even the more i've tried, the more my eyes, my heart's vision start to blurry. Not because of the tears, but caused by problems, discomfort things, insecure feelings. My life battery is low, and i need an adapter to charge my battery, or maybe an elixir to recover everything in my life. I feel sick, I feel tired, i hate to think that maybe i've reached my limit.
Everybody needs someone, if they feel the same way like me. Either I. I don't want to start my research. I would waiting. Because, how can i start to research someone, if my heart has stucked to this boy. He's not my lover, he's not even my brother, and the most important he's not my boyfriend. But i love him. The deepest of my heart once had asked my brain to make him to be mine, but my brain said no. This once, my brain start to think logical.
Why my brain said no? Because it knew that he won't love my like the way i do. I'm not his type. I know i'm not the girl who likes shopping, who understands fashion, and update about it. I'm not the girl who always talks about boys, because you know i love you. I'm not the girl who tries really hard to get skinny and thin. I'm not the girl, who avoids to eat junk food. I'm not the girl who goes to mall, for shopping. I'm not the girl whose haircut is the newest model.
I'm just a girl who rather be herself, goes to mall just for the music stores, bookstores, the cinema, and the cafe. I can spend more than an hour in a bookstore. I don't care about what people say about my music sense which is you know kinda weird. Maybe i'm the only one who understand my laptop. I rather be the girl who brings her sketchbook wherever she goes. I don't know, i'm gonna continue this.

 SEE? NTAR GUE BUAT NOVEL GUE CANTUMIN ISI POST INI WAKAKAKA CERITANYA CEWENYA GALAU DITINGGAL (maybe ditinggal gebetan, gatau juga deh) GATAU DITINGGAL SIAPA BUT SHE LOVES MUSIC.  yux cao babay!

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